Saturday, December 15, 2012

The Heartbreak in the Season

  We finished Nehemiah at the beginning on December.  The name of the study was Nehemiah, A heart that can break.  Well this December has been filled with tragedy and sadness in all directions for me.  My precious mom has been sick and is in the hospital.  We are not sure when she will be getting out, but we are praying before Christmas.  A friends sisters husband had a heart attack and passed away at the age of 42, leaving behind his wife and 2 children.  Another friends friend sister was killed in a car accident leaving behind her husband and 4 kiddos 3 of which are very young.  Oh yeah and she was pregnant.  Then yesterday the senseless killing of so many innocent children and teachers who died protecting them.  Not to mention the previous months of losing my grandmother and my husbands grandfather.  My heart is broken.  Truly broken.  The brokenness of it all is so much especially at this joyful time of year.  I myself have been busy and exhausted.  With my mom in the hospital, all my "plans" have been altered.  I try and get up there most days to see her and spend some time with her.  Other days I just cant.  When I cant, it breaks my heart again.  I don't know if I have ever felt so broken over a Christmas season.  But what I do know is that I have felt closer to God because of it all.  I have cried out to him, it feels like every day.  My daily prayers have changed to crying out to him for healing and comfort of all those broken around me.  It just seems natural to do so.   Yesterday, I left extra early to pick up my daughter from preschool and hold her extra tight.  I took her to Sweet Cece's just because I could.  Last night there was a cookie exchange that I missed, because my husband works so very hard so I can stay home, so I sat and snuggled with my girl and read her books until bed time.  I thought of those who could no longer do that, and I was sad for them and grateful to hold my little girl in my arms.  I have seen political rhetoric asking for a ban of guns, more help for the mentally disabled and more. 
   Here are my thoughts, no one could have seen this coming.  I think we are affected by this because they were small innocent children who did not deserve this (not that anyone does but we hold children in higher regard as a society).   People in general want to blame someone or something, guns, God, mental ability etc.  Lets all be real for a minute....guns don't kill people and a gun ban will just bring about more guns, God had nothing to do with this, evil exists and this is proof, God will be there for those families and what He will do with it is only known to Him alone,  as for mental ability, I have no information to bring to that other than no one can know the thoughts of every single person at every single moment of every single day.  It just cant happen.  People want to blame.  How about instead looking to God and trying to live as He guides us to.  True peace can only come from Him.  Peace like a River.  I cannot imagine being one of those parents in Connecticut, but I will continue to pray for them, and all the families right now that need prayers.  Instead of trying to place blame and throw our political ideas out there, lets try to grieve as a country, pray as a country, and live as children of God.  In the tragedy that surrounds us, I find comfort in seeing more and more people turning their eyes to the Lord.  Maybe thats we are getting out of this.  Remembering that Jesus is the reason for the Season.  Our Savior was born and died for us.  Let us not forget that fact.  I leave you with something I saw on Facebook and thought appropriate to share:

This was written by Max Lucado today and is a prayer that could could spill from any of our hearts this evening:

Dear Jesus,

It's a good thing you were born at night. This world sure seems dark. I have a good eye for silver linings. But they seem dimmer lately.

These killings, Lord. These children, Lord. Innocence violated. Raw evil demonstrated.

The whole world seems on edge. Trigger-happy. T

icked off. We hear threats of chemical weapons and nuclear bombs. Are we one button-push away from annihilation?

Your world seems a bit darker this Christmas. But you were born in the dark, right? You came at night. The shepherds were nightshift workers. The Wise Men followed a star. Your first cries were heard in the shadows. To see your face, Mary and Joseph needed a candle flame. It was dark. Dark with Herod's jealousy. Dark with Roman oppression. Dark with poverty. Dark with violence.

Herod went on a rampage, killing babies. Joseph took you and your mom into Egypt. You were an immigrant before you were a Nazarene.

Oh, Lord Jesus, you entered the dark world of your day. Won't you enter ours? We are weary of bloodshed. We, like the wise men, are looking for a star. We, like the shepherds, are kneeling at a manger.

This Christmas, we ask you, heal us, help us, be born anew in us.

Hopefully,
Your Children

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